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\u201cPresents are made for the pleasure of who gives them, not the merits of who receives them.\u201d \u2015 Carlos Ruiz Zaf\u00f3n<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n Every year, December sees my family celebrate two birthdays, Christmas, and Chanukah.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n With gift-giving in the forefront of my mind this month, I\u2019m stopping to consider how gifts can be expressions of love rather than just presents for presents\u2019 sake.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Dr. Gary Chapman\u2019s theory of \u201clove languages\u201d offers distinct categories of ways different people give and receive love. These categories include quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, physical touch, and receiving gifts.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n According to Dr. Chapman\u2019s website, people who identify with receiving gifts as their main love language \u201cthrive on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift.\u201d It\u2019s not because they\u2019re materialistic. They simply treasure gifts as \u201cvisual representations of love.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n That idea is accurate in my experience too. Take, for example, my jewelry box. It\u2019s full of items that are technically very similar, like earrings or bracelets. However, to me, there\u2019s a big difference between the bracelet I bought on a whim and the bracelet my husband gave me that once belonged to his grandmother. Even if they\u2019re technically worth the same amount monetarily, the second bracelet is a tangible reminder of my husband\u2019s love. It\u2019s a symbol of family and love throughout generations \u2014 of where we came from, and of future generations yet to be.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n This year, I\u2019m interested in giving gifts that are representations of love. Here\u2019s how to approach gifts with a love language mindset:<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n There have been times when I\u2019ve received the exact gift I wanted, and yet it didn\u2019t feel as good as the gift I didn\u2019t know I needed. For instance, one of the best gifts I\u2019ve received was a creative writing workbook. It wasn\u2019t something I would have picked out for myself. But as I started to use it, I realized how much I\u2019d needed an outlet for self-expression. Is there someone in your life who\u2019s tired and needs rest? Someone who\u2019s lonely and needs company? Someone who\u2019s scared and needs encouragement? Let that be the guiding inspiration behind your gift to them.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n While giving an expensive gift can be exciting, it\u2019s generally not the cost of the gift that makes it memorable or meaningful. This is especially easy to forget during the holidays, when there\u2019s so much glossy advertising suggesting otherwise. Even the priciest gift\u2019s glittering aura can fade quickly once it\u2019s unwrapped and put away. Try not to get hung up on the cost of your gift, but rather, its impact on the recipient.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n This one might seem like a no-brainer. But nothing detracts love from a gift more than getting the feeling that it\u2019s just an afterthought. Don\u2019t forget, and don\u2019t wait until the last minute. One strategy is to jot down ideas throughout the year, taking note of interests your loved one mentions. The fact that you made the effort to remember will mean a lot. Also, don\u2019t forget presentation. Taking the extra time to wrap your gift nicely will reflect the time you took on what\u2019s inside.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\nGo for gifts that make them feel cared for or understood.<\/h2>\n
Don\u2019t feel obligated to spend a lot of money.<\/h2>\n
Put time and effort into the gift.<\/h2>\n